Jokes

This is a email i received,by FunAndFunOnly.net.This is only part of it,may request if wanted to see more.

Lady: Is this my train?
Station Master: No,it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady: Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take the train to New Delhi.
Station Master: No Madam,I afraid that it's too heavy.

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A drunkard was brought to court.
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded thr gravel on his table and shouted,'Order,order!'
The drunkard immediately responded,'Thank you,Your honor,I'll have a scotch and soda.'

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Customer: Waiter,do you serve crabs?
Waiter: Please sit down sir,we serve everyone.

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Customer: Waiter,is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter: Can't you tell the difference by taste?
Customer: No,I can't.
Waiter: Then does it really matter?

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Little Susie came running into the house after school one day,shouting,
'Daddy! Daddy! I got a 100 in school today!'
'That's great,Sweetheart,'said her daddy.
'Come in to the living room and tell me about it.'
'Well,began the confession.'I got 50 in spelling,30 in maths and 20 in science.'